-20-

WordPress informs me that I now have 20 followers. I’ve come a long way from my audience of mom!

I got a trophy.

In honour of this special occasion and my newfound fame, I have decided to create a post of -20-.

20 Things I Think Are Awesome*
*In absolutely no particular order at all

ONE:

Someone invented cake.

Who invented cake? Apparently, the ancient Egyptians. That’s a thing I know now, and it’s a thing you know now. Rock on, Egyptians, you are a credit to the human race.

TWO:

Zero food waste laws/initiatives.

France enacted a ban in 2016 on throwing away food. Specifically, grocery stores throwing away food that was still edible. Food insecurity is a huge, huge problem throughout the world and the fact that wealthy countries throw out up to nearly 60% of salvageable food is shameful.

In my city, one of the grocery chains has started its own initiative to reduce waste at all 4 of our local locations, by diverting food to food banks or to farms for animals. I am thrilled and I hope that it’s the start of a much larger trend.

THREE:

Memes.

FOUR:

FINAL FANTASY VII REMAKE.

Seriously, nothing I say is gonna be as epic as this video. I CAN HARDLY WAIT.

FIVE:

Obvious Plant.

Obvious Plant brings us such gems as:

SIX:

Portugal’s drug policy. For real.

So Portugal had this radical idea to treat drug addiction as a health issue rather than a criminal one. Why the world seems generally silent on this, I do not know, except that I truly believe, (and have said many, many times), that people seem hardwired to be needlessly punitive.

In 2001 … Portugal became the first country to decriminalise the possession and consumption of all illicit substances. Rather than being arrested, those caught with a personal supply might be given a warning, a small fine, or told to appear before a local commission – a doctor, a lawyer and a social worker – about treatment, harm reduction, and the support services that were available to them.

The opioid crisis soon stabilised, and the ensuing years saw dramatic drops in problematic drug use, HIV and hepatitis infection rates, overdose deaths, drug-related crime and incarceration rates. HIV infection plummeted from an all-time high in 2000 of 104.2 new cases per million to 4.2 cases per million in 2015. The data behind these changes has been studied and cited as evidence by harm-reduction movements around the globe.

Portugal’s radical drugs policy is working. Why hasn’t the world copied it?

If you read the article, you’ll see that there’s stagnation happening there too – but in the midst of what can only be described as an epidemic of addiction, we need to start looking at things that work and benefit society as a whole. It’s a start. It’s a start we could all learn from.

SEVEN:

Castles.

Castles.

CASTLES, MAN! Old castles, new castles, English Castles, Irish Castles, German Castles, Japanese Castles, renovated castles, crumbly castles, CASTLES. CASTLESSSS!

EIGHT:

Unicorns.

And Scotland.

Because I am half Scottish, and proudly, because… the National Animal of Scotland is the Unicorn. No shit.

NINE:

Sleep. Seriously, sleep is awesome. Caffeine is also awesome. Lets rewind. Energy. Having energy is awesome. Me, I have none. Ever. If you do have some energy, just know that I envy you, and if it ever becomes possible to mug a person for their energy, I’ve probably got my tired, baggy eye on you.

TEN:

Music.

I’m one of those people who has probably less-than-zero musical talent and yet I cannot imagine a life without music.

Where words fail, music speaks.

Hans Christian Andersen

Music, music, any music. So many soundtracks to my life. I tend to prefer heavier music, which encompasses a wiiiiiiiide range of genres, but I’ll listen to most anything from classical to metal. Exceptin’ country, and if I’m gonna be honest, a good chunk of rap. Cause, barf.

ELEVEN:

Medical advances.

From vaccines to treatments to transplants to life-saving interventions, we are living longer and better than ever before. It’s nice how, inching toward 40-years-old, people will now call me a “young lady” instead of “the village hag.” I mean, there was a time I would’ve been called quite advanced in years.

My mother has outlived her own mother by over a decade now, both with heart disease, one with modern medicine, one with 1970’s medicine. I am absolutely grateful for that.

I’ve never had polio, diptheria, measles, mumps, rubella, hepatitis, tetanus… and neither have my children.

Mental health knowledge and advancement, huge. From therapy to medication, things that have literally been life savers for me and many others that I know.

Thanks, science!

TWELVE:

Technology. Cause, of course.

Without electricity, devices, internet… none of this is possible. I have about as much understanding of how it all works as I have understanding on what makes a brain work, but I’m grateful to have it all.

THIRTEEN:

Languages other than English. And, I have to say, especially German. (I’m also half German, so this also makes me proud.)

Kummerspeck (German)
Excess weight gained from emotional overeating. Literally, grief bacon.

Shemomedjamo (Georgian)
You know when you’re really full, but your meal is just so delicious, you can’t stop eating it? The Georgians feel your pain. This word means, “I accidentally ate the whole thing.”

Tartle (Scots)
The nearly onomatopoeic word for that panicky hesitation just before you have to introduce someone whose name you can’t quite remember.

Mamihlapinatapai (Yaghan language of Tierra del Fuego)
This word captures that special look shared between two people, when both are wishing that the other would do something that they both want, but neither want to do.

Backpfeifengesicht (German)
A face badly in need of a fist.

Pelinti (Buli, Ghana)
Your friend bites into a piece of piping hot pizza, then opens his mouth and sort of tilts his head around while making an “aaaarrrahh” noise. The Ghanaians have a word for that. More specifically, it means “to move hot food around in your mouth.”

Faamiti (Samoan) 
To make a squeaking sound by sucking air past the lips in order to gain the attention of a dog or child.

Gigil (Filipino)
The urge to pinch or squeeze something that is irresistibly cute.

Vybafnout (Czech) 
A word tailor-made for annoying older brothers—it means to jump out and say boo.

Fremdschämen (German); Myötähäpeä (Finnish)
The kinder, gentler cousins of Schadenfreude, (pleasure derived by someone from another person’s misfortune), both these words mean something akin to “vicarious embarrassment.”

Lagom (Swedish)
Maybe Goldilocks was Swedish? This slippery little word is hard to define, but means something like, “Not too much, and not too little, but juuuuust right.”

Pålegg (Norwegian)
Sandwich Artists unite! The Norwegians have a non-specific descriptor for anything – ham, cheese, jam, Nutella, mustard, herring, pickles, Doritos, you name it – you might consider putting into a sandwich.

Layogenic (Tagalog)
Remember in Clueless when Cher describes someone as “a full-on Monet…from far away, it’s OK, but up close it’s a big old mess”? That’s exactly what this word means.

Bakku-shan (Japanese)
Or there’s this Japanese slang term, which describes the experience of seeing a woman who appears pretty from behind but not from the front.

Zeg (Georgian)
It means “the day after tomorrow.” OK, we do have “overmorrow” in English, but when was the last time someone used that?

Boketto (Japanese) 
It’s nice to know that the Japanese think enough of the act of gazing vacantly into the distance without thinking to give it a name.

L’esprit de l’escalier (French)
Literally, stairwell wit—a too-late retort thought of only after departure.

Hygge (Danish)
Denmark’s mantra, hygge is the pleasant, genial, and intimate feeling associated with sitting around a fire in the winter with close friends.

Cavoli Riscaldati (Italian)
The result of attempting to revive an unworkable relationship. Translates to “reheated cabbage.”

Bilita Mpash (Bantu)
An amazing dream. Not just a “good” dream; the opposite of a nightmare.

Luftmensch (Yiddish)
There are several Yiddish words to describe social misfits. This one is for an impractical dreamer with no business sense.

Schlemiel and schlimazel (Yiddish)
Someone prone to bad luck. Yiddish distinguishes between the schlemiel and schlimazel, whose fates would probably be grouped under those of the klutz in other languages. The schlemiel is the traditional maladroit, who spills his coffee; the schlimazel is the one on whom it’s spilled.

Here’s a whole other compilation from Twitter at Bored Panda. Does anyone have more to add? Please, oh please do.

FOURTEEN:

Food Network food challenges. These are my sports, cause I hate sports. Someone said to me once that they hated how there are very few “cooking” shows anymore, you know, the ones where someone just cooks a dish in front of the camera and shows you how to do it. Lame-a-saurus. I know how to cook, I want to see people battle it out to make something edible out of Macgyver tools.

You gotta make a dessert out of mustard and Eggos and Lucky Charms marshmallows? HALF AN HOUR! GO! I love it.

FIFTEEN:

People who are comfortable in their own skin.

I wanted to say “People who don’t give a shit what other people think” but I felt that was too broad and could easily include people who refuse to change toxic behaviours that hurt others around them, which is just selfish and immature.

I love the people who, no matter what society or anyone tells them, are not ashamed of looking like/acting like/being themselves. I love authenticity. Why should anyone feel sorry for their skin colour, their body type, their “imperfections.”

Got stretch marks? Cellulite? Freckles? Scars? Things that show you lived? Cool. Have a weird sense of humour? Awesome. Do you like your hair in unnatural colours? Fantastic.

Be who you are and say how you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.

Dr. Seuss

SIXTEEN:

Horror. Ha.

So I love horror, anything. Movies, games, pictures, stories. The creepier the better. Anyone looking for some delightfully creepy shows? All of these can be found on streaming services.

Try Dark on Netflix (it’s German, and if you are not German, I suggest you leave it in German and turn on English subtitles because it comes across cheesy dubbed).

Channel Zero. You can find this on Shudder, it’s amazing.

Castle Rock, on Hulu, or if you’re Canadian like me, Crave.

I’m a huge Silent Hill fan. The games, not as much the movies. And honestly, not even all the games. But I remember when the first one came out and it was groundbreaking at the time. I heard (read?) that it was influenced by the art of Francis Bacon and the movie Jacob’s ladder. I have no idea how true that is, but I would believe it – it’s mind-bending.

Other games, Until Dawn was pretty cool – and like a Choose Your Own Adventure. Evil Within, 1 & 2. There’s a Blair Witch game coming out that looks pretty wicked, which shocked me cause I felt the movie was pretty -meh-.

Stephen King also came out with a sequel to The Shining – Dr. Sleep, which was pretty cool.

SEVENTEEN:

Animals.

Seriously, animals are awesome. Plain pet-type animals; cats and dogs, farm animals, wild animals. Look at these!

Okay I find that list comes short. How about these?

Sugar gliders!
Pangolin!
Whatever kind of bat this is!
Orcas. IN THE WILD WHERE THEY BELONG.

Yeah my list comes short too, cause damnit, so many animals. Even the animals who want to eat me look majestic AF usually, so they’re awesome. In pictures. Awesome to look at in pictures.

EIGHTEEN:

The Lonely Island.

Because they are hilarious.

One of my most favourites.

Seriously, sofa king funny. Go youtube them. If you’re disappointed, well, I don’t know what to tell you, weirdo.

NINETEEN:

People.

So depending on who I’ve been interacting with, what news I’ve been paying attention to, or how tired I may be – I might want to destroy all humans, or I might really, really be amazed by them. I’m legitimately bipolar, so I feel entitled, just let me have this.

Individuals do some really awful things, but so often that brings out the good in others. People have done amazing things for me in my life, people come together to help for any number of things. People give time, money, effort. People are kind and generous. People. What a bunch of bastards. But on the whole, not really.

TWENTY:

Holy shit, this has been harder than I thought and I never thought it was going to be super easy. I made it! 20!

How do I wrap this up with a bang?

LIFE.

Life is awesome. With all its ups and downs, with all its trials and triumphs, all the beauty in the world – life is a gift that’s worth living.

Everything is awesome. Everything is cool when you’re part of a team. Everything is awesome when you’re living our dream.

Oh and here’s Lonely Island again.

And lego. Unless you step on it.

4 thoughts on “-20-

  1. Lovely post just appreciating life! I wish I could remember some of the French idioms I learned over the summer. My friends were amused by the English phrases “bun in the oven” and “steal my thunder.”

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s